BIRTHDAY BALL

He cried most the night but all the same, it was a superb way of celebrating the wonderful 365 days of survival under our belts. This boy was born into the eye of the tornado and although things have quieted down around him, he continues to barrel through life with a whirlwind affect left in his shadow.   He was merely a 3 week old duckling when we packed up and moved, 20 weeks when we added another sibling, 6 months when he was sealed to his family, and 9 months when we packed up and moved again. He hasn't missed a beat but in the last few weeks of a more stagnant lifestyle he's learned a few tricks. He walks, he's obsessed with balls, and he can out holler any other child in the house. I'm sure it's a method of survival, survival of the loudest - seems to gets his needs met the quickest. 

He wasn't too keen on the birthday hat I spent hours and hours making or the cake for that matter. Of course. But what he did LOVE was his new place of residence in his waking hours. Rita knew just what he needed when she scored this awesome, indoor trampoline. And what's a trampoline if it's not filled with the boys favorite toy?! Balls!
And just when he's worn himself out from jumping and clanking around on his new work bench, he can put his feet up for a little R&R in the new club chair his Nana brought him.

We ate cake, blew out candles, dipped ice cream cones into sprinkles, opened gifts and what birthday would be complete without a singing bouquet of balloons? I mean, really!

The party was a ball and I think he rather enjoyed it... except for the screaming hat and cake part :)

ME MONKEY TURNS 1

5:42 am last year my little crush was born.  And just like his character I've grown to know, when he decides what he wants... there's no stopping him. Thus, his 45 minute labor and delivery. He was ready to get into my arms... and I was ready for him.

We're busy playing and celebrating today. So here's some delightful photo's of my little boyfriend and tomorrow we'll share our party deets.

birthday

Month 1

Month 2

Month 3

Month 4

Month 5

Month 6 

Month 7

Month 8

Month 9

Month 10

Month 11

1 year

this smile and those lashes just melt my soul every time. 

I've never met a more playful, rambunctious, zestful person and he's awesome.

IF MY HOUSE COULD SPEAK...

Ha! If this house could speak it would tell you all how batty I am and that I cry at least once a day and I'm working on laughing at least as much as I cry. But that's neither here nor there.
What this post is actually about is what I want my house to say to new comers or old comfy friends:

"Anyone is always welcome here."

"Come in, sit down, and tell me everything... I'll make you feel better."

"Clean, organized, but very welcoming."

"I love my family."

"Amusement"

"You are home." 

It's so hard to style our new house because I love such opposing looks and "feel." My instinctual side leans heavily toward uber modern and minimal. Yet my heart wants the decor to feel intriguing, safe, hospitable. Contradictory - yup. It also depends on what I want for myself versus what I'd want for my kids. 

I want:

What I want my kids and my company to experience:

Kinda contradictory ya think. So I'm trying my bestest to incorporate both styles and elements in their respectful places of the house. Plus the fact that I have $0 budget - is adding to the challenge. But I'm reminding myself that a house is created quickly - but a HOME is created over time. 

Tomorrow I'll show you my newest element of welcome - we like to watch our family grow. 

JOY SCHOOL

Thanks to the lovely ladies of our old digs who are keeping me in the "inner circle"- Layla will be starting Joy School next month. And the hunt for the perfect back pack began months ago. Why is it too much to ask for a backpack without the heavy dose of princess goo splattered all across it? And must it be larger than life and double as a rolling suitcase? Honest to Pete already.
After searching high and low.... alas! The perfect pack for my Buca Bird. The Skip Hop jr animal pack. Made for little bodies age 3 and includes an insulated snack pouch.

It will be here in 1 week. Can't wait wait to fill it with all sorts of school supplies. Oh the day dreams! Pencils, notebooks, fresh pointy crayons!!!! Ooohh La La!

BORN IN THE MOUNTAINS

There are few things I love more than taking the children up to the mountains to cheer on their dad as he pushes his body to the highest limit. It might seem to some a little pathetic that I sacrifice my own Saturday's to support Kday, but truth be told - it's an excuse to get up in the mountains and relish in the fresh air. It pains me a little to watch the kids get dirty and I have to repeat to myself, "It's OK let them have fun, It's Ok, It's OK, It's OK." Over and over and over, I seriously can't even carry on conversations attentively sometimes because I'm so focused on my mindful chanting. Ridiculous, I know. We cycle through about 100 baby wipes per Saturday as I scurry around and clean the children between rounds of dirtiness. You really should be proud, last weekend I didn't even change Layla's outfit when it got dirty, I just let it reflect the exciting day she had in the mountains. 

"Daddy has a monster truck!" said Layla, while munching on a cookie in the TEAM KUHL Unimog.

The part I love most about Kday's racing lifestyle is that my children have been introduced to our favorite mountains in Utah from the day they were born. Layla is more comfortable sitting in the chariot at the race, baking in the sun, counting racers passing by, and ringing the cowbell as she hollers for her daddy - than playing in her own back yard. Yesterday Kday and I watched as our first child raced her bike for the first time. It was one of my favorite Mama Moments ever. To my surprise, she went for it like a champion and she showed no fear. She braved the bumps in the road, and charged up the hills just like her dad. 

And she got a winner embrace with her dad after she took 2nd place.  (Would have taken first if the other little girls family wouldn't have given me the stink eye for telling Layla to make a pass before the finish line. I had to restrain my competitive tendencies.) Watching Kday kneel next to his daughter and cry with joy as she showed off her first race ribbon, was another Mama Moment. The whole day reminded me that there are rewards for us mothers that put in so much time and effort into the daily grind. 

 I should also mention that Kday finished off the 100K race with 11,000 feet of climbing in just over 5 hours and secured a spot in the top 10 Pro's. He was discouraged with this result as he had higher expectations of himself, but we would have still been at the finish line cheering if he had been the rider that took over 9 hours to finish dead last.

This bike race thing is our family lifestyle and I feel like the mountains speak to me and provide me with clarity. Yesterday the mountains told me to find gratitude in the beautiful triple threat that sat before me and clapped as their daddy climbed on stage and accepted his award. I hope my children will find the same joy in the mountains and kday and I have. 

A PICTURE'S WORTH A THOUSAND....?

Words? Yes, but are they words that describe the photo or are they words that we use as ammunition to find perfection in others and fault in ourselves? I believe this recent gem describes it better than I can...

HUFFINGTON POST - The Good, the Bad and the Filtered: Truth About My Postpartum Life

It's too easy to assume everyone else's life is perfect behind their facebook and instagram photos. But it's not necessarily a bad thing that we try to capture the good moment amidst the raging storm of crying children and poopy diapers.

This week has been a doozy. We're working through some hard stages with the kiddos and without DAILY sometimes MULTIPLE DAILY prayer... I wouldn't be surviving all the screaming kids. So just a word to the wise, when you check out you're friends pictures and think to yourself, "they have it so great..." you're the one labeling their picture.  Because I can almost guarantee that they're label would say something like, "after 3 hours of crying and chucking a bottle against the wall, this baby finally fell asleep so I must get a picture to remind me of how cute they are... before they wake up."

:)

my most recent instagram capture: While driving down the road after hitting up the bank, Layla said "Mom, you just keep driving and I will keep eating my sucker, OK?"

Have a wonderful weekend. We'll be spending ours HERE wishing kday good luck.

WEEKEND POLL

Layla playing pizza "guy"... because apparently only guys serve pizza.

I have this thing... it's kind of an annoying habit, but more. It's less habitual and more necessity. Which is what probably makes it a problem....

I go into the play room after Layla and/or friends clean up and I re-put everything away - In the right place. For example: I can't stand to just have the wooden pizza set just shoved into the play kitchen cabinets, I need to take all the toppings off and place them in the pink bin, straighten the slices of pizza and put it all together with the pizza cutter and serving spatula in a nice straight row. Or I pull all the toys out of the white bins and organize them into coordinating toy things. And on a really bad/good day you might even catch me rearranging all the furniture in the doll house and straightening the doll house beds.
So my food for thought this weekend is this:
At which point does it cross the line between organized and just plain pathetic?
Enjoy your families this weekend because that's the best part.

DO IT

I can feel the itch to start running nearing my soul. It's been knocking at the door for a few weeks now and I'm hoping to answer and let it in soon. This definitely added to my inspiration to stop hating myself and just start doing what I love. Running (jogging really, or more like shuffling...whatever)

FAMILY OUTINGS

Main point:

You win some

You lose some

Statistically speaking, it's a matter of science that not all family outings are going to be lovely, enjoyable events. With three children, two of which are just as stubborn as their mother... it's only a matter of time before we chalk one family outing as a "fail." 

We've been enjoying our evenings relishing the beautiful sights that Utah has to offer and it's been very successful. Until yesterday. Because we've had such great times together lately, Kday and I decided to venture out to the Tour of Utah first stage in downtown Ogden. Kday enjoyed a nice 113 mile ride while I gathered the children, packed lunches and bags, pottied and diapered everyone and so forth... Noon rolled around and I prepared to load the car and head up to 25th street to meet up with post ride Kday. And we didn't roll out of the garage until 2:09 pm. Two hours and nine minutes of Layla throwing a fit. Kicking, screaming, crying. The boys napped through the majority of it - thank heavens - because who knows what I would have done if she had woken them. A few swear words later and a lot of sweat dripping down my face and hair... we headed north. 

Rider's loudness affected Owen a little too much today and while Rider filled the car with ear piercing outbursts, Owen cried and Layla verbally replayed the punishment I had threatened her with. All the way to Ogden. I pulled into the parking stall and wept. I couldn't take Riders 100 decibel screeches any longer, Ohwee's whining and crying and Layla saying, "I cried and screamed at you today mom, so I had to sit in time out." Over and over and over. Kday patted me on the back and promised an afternoon of fun. Before we could even walk one city block from the car the whining ensued as Layla said, "I'm haawwwwt." "I don't want to walk moooooooaaaaaaaawwwwwwwm." I tried with every fiber of my being to hold it together and not turn back and come home. (which might have been a good idea after all)

Three hours later of whining, crying, and sweating, and no naps, spilled crackers, more crying, time outs and more crying (by both me and Layla)... I decided to make the executive decision to cancel our dinner and night out on the town. As Kday dragged a screaming toddler behind me and I pushed the very tired babies to the car, I cried too. And I bit my tongue and held my breath so that I wouldn't do anything I regretted. (like flip out and start screaming in public) I just felt like such a failure and I felt torn between wanting to teach my children that it's not OK to kick and scream and cry to get what they want... and feeling understanding that Layla had missed her nap and was very tired and frustrated and didn't know how to explain that she'd rather just go home and sleep it off. So I walked briskly about ten feet in front of Kday and my screaming 3 year old and once we arrived at the car I climbed in and cried some more. We drove home while I spewed my emotions all over the car until I felt better. Then I felt bad that I was just doing the grown up version of what Layla had been doing in the park. Releasing my fatigue, boredom, and frustrations with tears and whining.... Am I a hypocrite I wondered?

Kday and I salvaged the evening with a happy meal for Layla, two cokes for us and a red box movie date on the couch after the children were in bed... promptly at 6:15 pm. Yes, all three of them needed sleep and ASAP. By 6:21 Layla was sawing logs, mouth opened and body sprawled across her bed. The boys didn't make a peep until 7 this morning and Layla didn't move a muscle until 8:10 this am. That's how tired she was. 

Around midnight I wandered up to bed and was welcomed by some chocolates and flowers from Kday. He wanted me to know that he understood and that I wasn't a failure. He's the best.

So, you win some and you lose some and my goal is not to cry over spilled crackers next time. Just head to the car and hope that the statistics stay in our favor of winning more than losing. 

ANYTHING?

Layla is expanding her nurturing side... a little. She has a doll that she's been growing more attached to and when I asked her what she wanted to name it (about 3 months ago) she thought long and hard. And   the perfect name popped right out of her little buck teeth... Anything. Not to be confused with the idea of calling this baby any name that comes to mind. No, she literally wanted to name her doll "Anything."
So she carries Anything around the house, she dresses Anything in baby clothes and she sleeps with Anything at night. I love watching her play mom and the way she talks to her baby doll speaks to how I must be talking to Layla. It's taught me a few lessons in how I'm interpreted, good and bad. Anything came with us up to Dealer Camp in Park City last weekend and I think she rather enjoyed the scenery. And the best part about this doll, aside from her awesome name, she always sleeps with one eye open. I would too if Buca were sleeping next to me... she's a little unpredictable.

So creepy right!? :)

I can't write about our weekend in Park City without mentioning these Dapper Dan's, they were on their best behavior and we had a blast.

TALKING AND TRAINING

I put it off for almost an entire year. 

But the time has come.

Potty Training.

I dreaded it and imagined the worse.

Because last year when we tried, it was awful, terrible, and a complete fail.

And let's be honest, diapers are convenient. 

Taking 3 kids into the bathroom at the store is inconvenient.

I couldn't be lazy anymore, so we faced the music.

And it's been one of the easiest things Layla and I have ever attempted together.

WHAT?!

Seriously.

Cake.

Day 1 we went out to dinner with zero accidents.

Day 2 we went on our monthly 3 hour grocery shopping excursion with a successful potty trip at Costc0.

Day 3 A poop.

Day 4 we've had dry naps and nights since day 1. 

Awesome. 

I WILL SAY THIS ABOUT POTTY TRAINING:

If in doubt of whether or not your kid is ready.... WAIT. 

I give two thumbs down to those moms out there who stand proudly on their soapbox because they "train" their kids early... only to have an entire year of reminding your kid to use the potty every 20 minutes and hundreds of accidents. 

WAIT until their older and READY and in 1 day you'll be off the diaper addiction and I haven't had to remind Layla once. She tells me when she needs to go and it's only about every 3-4 hours. 

NOW THAT'S POTTY TRAINED :)

And a big shout out to this darling sister-in-law who created a super simple potty chart for us.

Muchos Gracias

And for your entertainment:

Ohwee talking for the first time.

I want to bite him because he's so cute.