HIPPIE SOMETHINGS

While risking sounding like a total hippie, I'm willing to admit that I attended a drum and chanting yoga class on Thanksgiving morning. Intriguing and very inspiring to say the least. My daily time on the yoga mat has evolved from simple physical strengthening to an unreserved connection of temporal body and eternal spirit. My yoga mat has become a place of refuge and a safe place to build my connection with the Holy Spirit. It's a quiet asylum to hear answers to prayers and to express gratitude to God.

The class on Thursday had live music including a didjeridu, drums, guitar and native flutes and chanting. I have been seeking something.  Something to stop the crazy talk in my head that has been spiraling out of control. Something to stop the self loathing when I look in the mirror. Something to start the cycle of positivity and self compassion again. I found it on the yoga mat. At the beginning of class I was handed a card with the chant of the day on it. It is the something I've been asking Heavenly Father for.

OM NAMAH SHIVAYA

(ome nah-ma shiv-eye-ya)

"I humbly bow to that Light within me which I am  becoming."

It reminded me that I'm on a journey and the destination isn't the reward, the journey is the reward.  Despite what my brain and the world wants me to believe, my weight doesn't make me a bad person. That mantra allowed me to be kind to myself and understand that my weight loss plateau over the last two years - is all part of the journey. There is a time and a season for all things and even though I wanted to reach my goal weight 2  years ago, it wasn't the right time. It's OK that I didn't. My journey has brought me to this point for a reason. It was necessary for me to be in this place, doing the things I'm doing - to find growth. I'm on course for becoming the Light within me that I have the potential to be, but I must be humble and know that I am not there yet.  The light is not a destination. The journey, the journey is what CREATES the light.


On a much lighter note: This is what Buca and I have been indulging in since we got home.

A ROUGH KIND OF WONDERFUL

Lady's been a little under the weather. Thanksgiving feasts were beautiful and even more delicious than ever, however I was more concerned about Buca. What I thought was a bad case of diaper rash and a bug bite turned out to be a bad case of MRSA. An antibiotic resistant staph infection in her legs that landed her in the ER on Thanksgiving evening. Good thing we didn't wait it out, it was only going to worsen into multiple little wounds. She escaped with only one sore needing to be opened and cleaned out and then packed with some special medicated gauze. A special antibiotic hanging in the IV bag for a day and now were home camped out on the couch. Every 6 hours we begrudgingly force her to choke down a nasty nasty antibiotic disguised as strawberry syrup and some "wound care" that involves un-packing her sore little by little each day. A few tears and no appetite are thankfully the only remains of our weekend at the hospital.

The wonderful part ---- 24 hour snuggling all weekend and our snuggle time on the couch for the next few days.

KEEPING IT TOGETHER - WEATHER WARNING

Just finished vacuuming my floors and drying all my laundry. Love my Dyson HandyVac by the way. Flashlights are set out as well as candles and all other necessities. Apparently it's the worst storm of the decade arriving at my house this very moment. We'll see. I think those weathermen are more worried about starching their white coats than they are forecasting the actual weather.
Well, if we lose power and we're trapped in the house. At least it will be a clean house. I can always opt to use my heated water on the camping stove to clean with instead of my allotted hot coco right?
Stay warm and snugly tonight and if you get the chance to play footsie's with your loves ones... go for it.

CHOICE

I was having an ugly day yesterday. Real ugly. Not just feeling that way but some ugly things were going on in life too. I went to yoga hoping to find some strength and solace on the mat. Read this on a slip of paper that was framed in the room with the extra yoga mats.

THRIVE
STRUGGLE
or
SUFFER

Made me think about the availability of choice, when sometimes it feels like things are "happening TO us" that we have no control over. But we DO have the control over our reaction.

What do you chose? 

LIGHT OF MY LIFE

Kday, the little whippersnapper  and I risked getting soaked to the core  to attend our first holiday event of the season. The Christmas Tree lighting at The Gateway. After the sounds of Peter Breinholt, we counted down the big moment.

Soaked to the core - we were indeed. But there's something about Christmas music and the season that tickles my heart a little. It catches me on the spot and I find myself overwhelmingly grateful for that moment. On this night, the moment was watching Lady and Kday dancing in the rain to the words of Silent Night. Gosh, how is my life so awesome?

WINDED

K.C made the fabulous suggestion of taking full advantage of the projected 65 degree weather yesterday. The plan encompassed a hike to Ensign Peak with the mini-me's in tow. Well, the weather forecast arrived about 24 hours in advance. Wednesday was the wonderful weather day and Thursday brought with it the Wind Gods. A little wind wasn't going to stop us.

K.C and Jamie braving the storm

We live in a most beautiful Ensign.

Layla and her betrothed... Mr Ma-gee. 

My Buka

Drained

We came. 

We conquered. 

We revised. 

And we rendezvoused  at the trailhead for lunch. 

I love the Ensign I reside upon. 

THE TALE OF THE PINK MARSHMALLOW

 

Cold weather running has brought a whole new set of challenges. Lady's not sure how she feels about this 1/2 marathon winter training plan. 

I think it's cute

Garmins and Gremlins

5 Miles with Becky yesterday. I'm loving my new Garmin Forerunner 110 that charts my run, heart rate and speed. I cursed Kday's name a little on the hill (he planned the route) but good conversation made it easily tolerable. I'll make sure and get a pic next time. Loving running in this fall weather. And love gazing at the snow dusted mountains during morning yoga practice today.
On the agenda today:
Relief Society Presidency Meeting
Babysit Layla's darling red-headed niece
Errands
Running with K.C
And some other stuff that's not interesting whatsoever.

Happy Tuesday- Here's a movie for entertainment purposes. It's from last July at the Spudman. I think Lady looks like Gremlin - a really cute one.

PACKED AWAY---

I've been delaying the inevitable. Avoiding the piles of newborn onesies and adoption memorabilia was not changing the looming reality that I needed to face. My parents gave me no choice, it was time to stow away the newborn and infant accoutrements that were strewn about their basement floor. Their basement entertainment room has been the gathering ground for Layla's outgrown baby necessities over the past sixteen months. It was time that organized it and packed it away.

As I lovingly folded each tiny set of clothing, I recalled snippets of the days she wore them. Most days I recalled were simply moments around the house, or while running errands. With the exception of her temple dress and the outfit she wore to the court house during our finalization, most of the days weren't anything special. Except, they were. They were special beyond measure. And my heart ached. It aches again the way it did before Lady's existance. Something inside created a pathway for fears to penetrate my mind and heart. Fear that I will be packing these moments of newborn-ness away forever, never to be reopened except to re-pack into a bag and send away for someone else to experience. 

There is a whispering in my heart. It's quiet voice is telling me it's time. I can't ignore the tapping on my soul that reminds me of my deep desire to be a mother to more spirits than just Layla.  Layla is not a "just" however, she needs siblings, Kday needs more children and so do I. How that is going to happen I'm not yet certain. If that is going to happen I'm also not certain. I hope the Lord will hear my prayers and if more children is not a possibility, I hope he'll quiet the whispering voice. If that silence comes,  I will continue in joy with the miracle I've been given. But if the future holds the miracle of more children, I must start looking for the path that will lead us there. 

For now, the bins are closed, labels made and the closet doors are closed. Temporarily I hope, because I relish every moment I have as a mother - and I dream of adding to those moments. 

UP TO

Go HERE, HERE  or  HERE to find out what I'll be up to this winter. Let the training begin. Also, let the excitement begin! And hopefully, let the weight loss begin.

TREE OF LIFE

Pondering ways to express my immense amounts of gratitude for all things given from HIM this month. This month of "Thanksgiving."
K.C concocted a plan... it began as a way to create a Tree of Gratitude that doubles as a holiday dinner center piece. It ended as a late night of girlish giggles and a dare that was performed by... yours truly.

This is the outcome. 

TREE OF GRATITUDE

We crafted some leaves of various sizes and colors and tied them with a lovely autumn yellow yarn. When those wonderful little thoughts of gratitude pop into your brain throughout the day, just write it down on a leaf and adorn the tree. By November 25th the tree shall be a vibrant reminder of the many good things in your life.

How are you expressing your gratitude this season?

BLOGGER SUCKS

BEEN TRYING TO UPLOAD A POST AND PHOTOS ALL MORNING LONG. DON'T BE A HATER  - EXCEPT TO BLOGGER BECAUSE IT'S GIVING ME A MAJOR MIGRAINE. ANYONE ELSE HAVING PROBS WITH UPLOADING PHOTO'S TO BLOGGER IN THE LAST 48 HOURS?

RAIN DROP WINDOWS

A storm's a brewing. 

I can feel it in my jacked up right shoulder.

Lady is ready and a waiting with her rain slickers. 

For pictures go HERE. I've tried for the life of me to upload these with obvious failure.
Hope you enjoy the rain as much as Lady does!

HOLY TIC TAC

Kday and I took the liberty of going on a little date tonight. We went here. Best place on Earth to take a date... except on Friday night. What a crowd. While waiting - I dared Kday to pick up an orange tic tac off the ground and eat it. He refused. I bet him $18 bucks and he still was too chicken. I guess this place isn't really a "betting" place anyway. I would have done it. He told me it was a "holy tic tac" and it needed to stay right where it was on the ground, under the bench in front of me. I should have bet him $20 bucks and a kiss.... I bet he totally would have caved. He likes kissing brunettes. After our date we drove home in separate cars and I raided my moms left over halloween candy and picked up Layla. Went home, cleaned the house and went to bed. Hot date huh? Would'a been hotter if Kday ate the tic tac.

FULL OF GOOD THINGS

A much needed hike was in order today. 

I took my crew with me. 

It was a necessity for all of us. 

Two men on horses, a cyclist and a runner commented "You sure have your hands full." 

After the last horseman commented on my hands being full, I replied "It's ok, they are full of good things." 

He agreed and carried on. 

It made my heart smile. 

I happily settled into the realization that I wouldn't want my hands to be full of anything of a different sort. 

A dog leash, a binki and a camera were the perfect things to carry an occupancy in my hands. 

And my heart. 

My life is full of good things. 

Mr. FANTASTICO

Have I ever explained to you just how amazing kday is? I dont have enough time right this very moment. it would take a really long post and I'm really exhausted right now and have an early yoga class with my name on it. Another day though and you'll get the chance to hear all about the fabuloroso man i roped into marrying me. He is the best of the best.... and he can rock the spandex better than any chick i know. But really - he's my absolute most favorite man on this earth.
528!

SNACK HILL

Yesterday my house was in rare form. The shadow of the Halloween Extravaganza weekend left a trail of an unkempt house.

I put that aside for  a few hours and met up with K.C for a little hike while the weather is oh so superb right now. Lady rocked her rainbow bright pants. With boots over top. I just can't possibly kiss her cheeks more frequently during the day. I love her so much.

This is the view from "Snack Hill," our destination which always includes a little treat, a break from the back pack, Kashi takes  a dip in the river, and some good conversation.

I think I might skip lunch and snack on this delectable little treat!

WHAT ARE YOUR INTENTIONS?

5:05 am and the alarm on my phone startles me to a muzzy wakeful state. The sticky warmth of Kday lures me back to sleep for a few moments before the snooz alarm rouses me again. I remind myself of my motto :make opportunities - not excuses.
I'm off to yoga at Infusions. It's more than just a "yoga studio," the space on my mat is about connecting my body and my spirit and taking time to assess my needs and taking care of myself. Implementing a yoga practice into my life has been a blessing of profound magnitude.

At the beginning of the practice the instructor almost always encourages us to set our intention for our practice that day. My intensions have ranged from "just getting through class to enjoy Shevasna," to "showing my body gratitude," or "to find inner strength." I have found this to be a tool that I want to carry over into my everyday "practice" in life. Before embarking on each day - taking time to decide my intention for the day, keeps me focused and reminds me of my purpose. Today, my intention is to find joy throughout the day. It sounds rudimentary, but it seems to bring my intention to reality when I take the time to chose what I want out of the day.

So I encourage you to try it today. 

Decide on your intention.

 It doesn't have to be grandiose or profound... it can be as simple as smile inside and out. 

What is your intention today?

Thanks to Becky for the pedicure - so my toes can look cute for yoga!

ROCTOBER FEST

We rocked the party for a full three days.... and then some. Rita always out does herself with D.licious food, drinks and such. A massive flare up of carpel tunnel has left my pumpkin carving hand in a painfully numb state. But it was well worth the work. The show was fantastic - as usual.

These are only a few of the 109 punkins we spent a bazillion hours carving. 

And what you're all waiting for.....

Here's Buka!

All the girl cousins were Fairy's. Custom made shirts, wands, head bands, and ankle ruffle cuffs.

I couldn't get enough of this little lady fairy. This year was a dream - minus the super duper bad weather that put quite the dampener on our soiree. Costumes had to be concealed with winter coats and gloves. Lady tricker treated to about four houses before deciding to make the fans come to her. So we partied it up inside and waited for the entourage to arrive.  Dad and Lady provided a little entertainment for the party.

We - grown folks rocked the 80's.

HALLOWEEN WAS RAD. It always is. I lament as I take down my decorations and pack away my trusty witches hat until next year.... It's "BOO!" to you  - until 2011.

NOW - I gotta get me tired body up and run off all the piles of candy I gleefully consumed this weekend. Hit the road jack.