To be absolutely honest, I'm losing my mind.... what's left of it anyway. I'm the least patient person ever invented. After waiting 7 years to get and stay pregnant, and nine months of counting down the days to meeting the miraculous soul that resides in me, I'm excited. My eagerness to go into labor has nothing to do with rushing the end of my pregnancy into extinction.
I wake up every morning and wonder when my contractions might start, if my water will break today, make sure I'm showered and fresh and ready to head to L&D if necessary. Then the day carries on and I wonder if each twinge could be the beginnings of a contraction. I lay in bed at night waiting for the first sign of my water breaking. It's ridiculous really. Then I wake up in the morning and I'm totally discouraged that nothing eventful happened and I have to shower and shave yet again and the waiting game clock resets and it's another 24 hours of hoping. Meanwhile Kday and Layla go about their day like their entire world is rock solid.
I'm just too eager to meet my own flesh and blood I guess. I'm too eager for the experience I had quit believing I'd ever have. I'm just too eager and I know better. I know that living in the realm of "I can't wait for...." is not a good place to constantly live in. I need to live in the moment, the now and experience the last few days of pregnancy without rushing through them to get to the end result.
It's just so hard when I know there is a yummy baby waiting to be swaddled and smothered with love!
2 comments:
This is so funny. I have been waking up every day at 5:30 for the past week. Feeling the same way. Discouraged that nothing has happened. So I am up this morning and thought, maybe Shannon has posted already. Ha... you have! Good to know that I am not the only person that goes through this. Bryce and the boys are calm as buttons and I am on the brink of going crazy.
You are surely learning patience and pics of Kev and kids are terrific!
Post a Comment