EXHALE AND EXCHANGE

Last week I realized I no longer had a need for the fifty gazillion burp rags in the cupboard, or the teensy tinesy hooded baby towels folded nicely in the closet... and all the other "baby paraphernalia" laying around the house. The first time I earned the right to enter the baby isle and not feel like an obvious outsider, I was in seventh heaven. I waited so so long to stock a nursery and pick out every detail and make it perfect. Well, now all that stuff is headed to storage. Wow that came fast. I was totally unprepared for the time to come to pack all that stuff up and move into toddlerhood. Duh shan, what did you think happens after an entire year of infancy!?
So after the cupboards were cleaned out, wiped down and re-stocked with new "big girl" items... I was having "baby product" withdrawals. So I bought this -

Layla's new ride --- Moo.

I've been avoiding the change from tiny snuggly baby to crawling wiggling child, from sleeping anywhere to whining everywhere, and doll size diapers to just dolls. Tonight after Lady woke up from her afternoon nap (another change... little to no morning nap - but an awesomely long pm nap) we just sat and played together. The Big Guy Upstairs continues to nudge my heart and remind me to STOP RESISTING and enjoy my ride with Lady. Oh, it's so so rad when I stop resisting her feisty-ness and I remind myself to live in the moment and at the very moment I stop... we totally connect. She'll look up at me and smile and the sparkle in her eyes speaks to me. It's like our spirits hugging and I need to always remember that sensation. 

So the baby rattles have been exchanged for "little people" circus trains and teething toys for doll houses. I'm excited for the change but a part of me aches with wonderment of whether those baby items will ever be extracted from storage and washed, folded and snuggled again...