UNDER THE INFLUENCE

I didn't believe them.

When everyone told me time would go too quickly.

The first three months of her life seemed to be in slow motion.

Then - 

It changed.

Life sped up.

Here we are:

School bound.

What?! 

The thing is...

I only have 2 more years with her.

And then...

She will spend more waking, daily hours under the influence of teachers - other than myself.

She will belong to the education system. 

She will no longer be my baby that goes where I go and fills my ear with a mousey voice of constant intriguing chatter.

2 years is not enough time. 

I want forever.

I want to be "Mom - the woman that knows everything and has all the answers." forever.

So I will listen now.

Enjoy every moment -

for it will pass in the twinkling of an eye. 

JOGGLING- the definition

They say: If you fall off the horse a thousand times... get back on a thousand and one.

I feel like this is the ten thousandth time I'm getting back on the horse.

It always feels better the moment I get back on - than it feels to stand next to the horse and debate walking away.

It's been 4 weeks since I've started working with Mary Foss, ie: The Boss Foss. My first day back on the horse I attempted a brisk walk - I barely made it 1.5 miles. And my body hurt. It ached, it cried, it moaned. And I felt like I wanted to get off that horse, walk hobble away and never look back. Ever.

But I kept going.

It' hasn't been as consistent and I or The Boss Foss would like it to be - but the mornings after a decent nights sleep, I've been waking up at 6am to walk.

A few weeks into my walking - my body hurt less and less and I even began to feel the twitching of a desire to run jog. It's Joggling actually. A mix of hobbling and a mix of jogging. My body still hurts and my ankles feel like they're going to give out beneath me at any step. I'm carrying so much weight I really can't call it running or jogging because it's a slow and decrepit shuffle... but it's the preface to an actual jog. "Someday,"  I chant under my labored wheezing, "someday you'll run again, someday."

My 1.5 miles grew to 2.5 miles and there it began - the bits and pieces of joggling between a few minutes of walking. It added up to a total of less than a half mile.

Today felt different - a good different. For the past two weeks I've been forcing myself to get in bed at 10 pm. And the last two nights, Ohwee even slept soundly through the night without waking me. And today I joggled the farthest I have since I started - .613 miles - non stop. What a feeling of accomplishment I felt. A feeling I haven't felt since birthing my son. Wow, I did that. It's been a while since I've accomplished anything with my body.  That's how down in the dumps my body is right now. But I joggled over a half mile and I loved it.

My body is screaming at me this afternoon and my right ankle usually causes me problems for the rest of the day on my walk days. But it's proof that I'm back on the horse and riding again. Giddy-Yup

JUST ANOTHER MANIC MONDAY

I have a love hate relationship with Monday's. It's my favorite day to get life back on track. Clean, plan, prepare, wash, fold, scrub, put away, re stock... etc. I love it. But it's also so annoying to lose an entire day to getting this done every week. My level of organization and cleanliness on any given Monday is usually a sign of the week to come and the level of chaos that ensues.  Ie: If I don't re stock all the diaper stations, catch up on laundry and mop the weekend mess off the floor... life is a lot harder when it comes time to diaper, dress and feed the children throughout the week.
P.S
I'm loving this overcast and cool, autumn weather - aren't you?

IT'S A ONCE A YEAR KINDA THING

My poor children. I must be the meanest mom on the block. I despise these shopping carts. As if I don't already have a wide enough load of people, car seats and stuff to haul around the store... like I need a limousine length shopping cart with perfect access windows for my children to rip everything off the shelves at eye level. Seriously. Who's ridiculous idea was this to invent a shopping cart that makes shopping an even more stressful event in a mothers life :)
Am I so mean - when Layla asks if she can ride in one, I tell her they only let you ride in them when it's your birthday. On her birthday, we picked her cake up at Harm0ns and yes, I let her ride in one. But I gave her lots of reminders that it's only on your birthday. So now when we approach a store with the dreaded car carts... my poor daughter says, "Oh, they have those birthday shopping carts. Can I ride in one again on my birthday?"
Am I so rude or what? Sorry kids. I love you - I'll make it up to you someday.

WHEN IT'S GOOD... IT'S SO GOOD

Tuesday was good to me. Actually this whole week has been on the ups, but Tuesday was especially insightful.
The day started off pretty rough. I was actually looking foreword to following my workout plan. It was 6:15 am, my walking shoes on, dog leash in hand and T-minus .5 seconds from walking out the door and Layla's door opens and she wanders downstairs. "Where you going mom?" Then a tantrum ensued because she couldn't go with me and I begged her to go back to bed. Of course her blood curdling screams awoke the entire household and there you have it - my attempt at exercise was once again sabotaged. Layla learned a hard lesson that if she gets out of bed and starts her day screaming... chores will fill her spare time until we can regain control over her now awake brothers. She put a load of laundry in and helped me fold a basket of dry clothes. Then we reviewed the get out of bed rules: 1. if you need to potty - go do it and get back in bed quietly. 2. you're welcome to get out of bed when the upside down letter L is on your clock and when you're happy. (7am)... and we continued on our day.

I had all the kids dressed, fed and the house cleaned by 9:30 am and that felt amazing. The boys napped and Layla helped me prepare all the ingredients needed for our dinner. She loves to don her apron and work as my assistant chef. As I was working on putting together my grocery list for later in the day - Layla came up from the play room holding a broken table leg. Instead of ranting and raving about how climbing on tables is not ok... I tried with all my might to implement the Love and L0gic techniques I've been trying to learn. I simply said, "Uh Oh, that's so sad. How are you going to fix that problem?" She didn't know so I made the suggestion that she probably needed to pay for the tools to fix it. She agreed, so we went upstairs and emptied her piggy bank onto her bed. She decided that 1/2 of all her money was enough to pay for the new table leg and I agreed. We gathered her coins into a bag and she happily handed it over to pay for some wood glue and screws. Done. Lesson learned and no screaming or crying required. I doubt she'll be climbing on any tables again soon. It was an awesome motherhood moment.

My mom came over and watched the boys while I took my Buca Bird on a little date to the grocery store. I certainly forgot how fun it is to hang out with her individually and she is such a gem. A sweet little helper that likes to have fun and soaked up the attention she so readily deserves. We shopped and tickled and sang songs and ate chocolate. I just love her so much.

Home, groceries away and we ALL took a nap. Yes, I took a nap with the Ohwee on my bed and it was a slice of heaven. He is my snugga bug and I hope he stays my little man forever. We all awoke and decided to play in the basement. The kids played happily in the playroom, I had Pand0ra Toddler Station blaring and I folded laundry. It was one of the happiest moments I've had with these three kids.
Then thanks to my morning dinner prep with Layla - dinner was done in a breeze.

Kids bathed, jammied and we played in the boys room until their eyes grew heavy.  And I watched my three beautiful children crawl around each other and giggle and laugh. My life is oh so good.

The key to my successful day was planning ahead, staying calm, and most of all LIVING IN THE MOMENT. BREATHING IN THE NOW. It makes such a difference when I just slowed down enough to enjoy the moment. Even the times when things weren't running smoothly. I really thought about the speed at which these kids lives are flashing by - this is a really hard stage but it's going to be over so so soon. Another year and Rider will be 2 and owen will be 1 1/2. I MUST SLOW DOWN AND ENJOY THESE BABY BOYS WHILE THEY ARE STILL BABIES. I feel like I missed the last year of Layla's life. She turned 2, all chaos began and before I knew it 3 hit me across the face. I don't want to miss anymore time. So I think we'll try to make more days like Tuesday. And life will be good.

TWENTY MINUTE RULE

It's kinda like the ten second rule with food... but not really.
I've come to the realization that for the most part our day runs pretty smoothly - thanks to a constantly tuned schedule. However, there's about 2-4 times a day when all hell breaks lose and I feel like the world in crumbling on top of me... and it seems to last for about 20 minutes. Twenty whole minutes of crying, whining, needy, meltdown chaos, and then we pull ourselves together and regain control of the situation. I've decided to label these moments as TMR time and just go with it when it happens. Pre-dinner table time and bed time seem to be the two most consistent TMR's of each day and depending on our outing of choice there's usually a TMR near the time we should pack up and head home. TMR's often include all three children needing to eat at the same time, the boys needing a diaper change and Layla needing a potty stop, and or everyone is tired and we need to get ready for naps. And more often than not: TMR= all three elements combusting at once.
When the twenty minutes of chaos begins, I usually just remind myself that it's only going to last a few short minutes and then we can reclaim control and move foreword. The best part is there's usually about 20 minutes of the calm before and after the storm... and I soooo look foreword to those calm moments.

TRICKS OF THE TRADE

While loitering at my mothers house and pawning my children off to her, so I could finally complete sewing a crib skirt for my almost eight month old.... she had a visitor. The Mrs. Caroline Taylor, mother of ten? kids, all born within a year apart of each other. Ya. Yikes stripes! I couldn't help but put my feelers out for any advice from a fellow perfectionistic mother. Her response: "There tricks you know!?"
Whhhaaahhht? Tricks?
Oh yes, this woman is brilliant and genius and I begged her for more tricks once she lured me in with the first two.
What's that? You want to know these super awesome tricks this woman speaks of? Get your pen and paper... these are good.
1. Dinner in the bathtub. You know those nights after you spend all day cleaning the house and mopping the goop of the kitchen floor and you REALLY don't feel like serving dinner only to find another mess of food and goop... again. Get the kids nakey, stick them in the tub, and serve pancakes, let them go ape wild with the mess and when they're done, wash rinse and done. GENIUS I tell you. I mean it's not like something I'd do every night. Besides, sloppy joes don't exactly wash down the drain... but we all have those nights when this idea would make life awesome.

2. Lunch on the dishwasher door. The answer to the "I do it!" stage of toddlerhood. When they insist on making their own sandwich or pouring their own drinks... open the door to the dishwasher and voila! You have a toddler height table that catches all spills and thrills and when they're done with their masterpiece PB&J - SHUT THE DOOR and the mess is gone!

Holy smokes! This woman should write a book. I begged her to email me more tips but I'm pretty sure she's too busy with her newborn grandchild and 5 of her kids moving over the past week. SO I'M ASKING YOU - WHAT ARE YOUR BEST TRICKS OF THE TRADE?

And Caroline- if you're reading this... you're amazing and I'm dying to hear more of your first rate mother of the year tricks.